Sartorial thingy

Rupert: As an international pup of mystery, it's very important for me to be well-dressed.

Sasha: And as a skinny malinky, it's very important for you to be warm.

Rupert: Yes, that too.

Sasha: In fact, we recently got caught in the rain, didn't we?

Rupert: I think I recall the occasion.

Sasha: And what did you do?

Rupert: My street-pup reflexes snapped into action, I wriggled out of my harness and ran to hide under a hedge. Record time, extreme flair, score 10!

Sasha: And then you refused to come out from under the hedge, so our human had to crawl under and get you, then carry you all the way home in the rain. We got wet too, you know!

Rupert: Well, it's very important for a half-starved pup to stay out of the cold wintry rain. And it hasn't happened since, I may add.

Sasha: That's true - our human makes sure you wear your nice warm, waterproof coat whenever we go out.

Rupert: And when I'm wearing it the rain doesn't bother me at all, no matter how hard it's coming down. I love my coat - it's a Weatherbeeta Landa, and it's padded and waterproof, it fits me very well and the colour makes my fur look fabulous! Our human put a hole in it so she could attach my leash to my harness through it.

Sasha: And you have some other clothes now, too, don't you. Why don't we start with your jammies?

Rupert: Why don't we start with my cool new red coat? It's cooler than my Landa, and thinner and more flexible, so it's more comfy.

Sasha: You like it because it's red.

Rupert: I also like it because it's reversible, and it's got aliens on the other side!

Sasha: Our human bought it from fluppies.com.au - you can choose any combination of colours, they can do special colours for you, and they can also custom-make whatever you want if you're a weird shape or size.

Rupert: That's where your safety raincoat came from, isn't it?

Sasha: Yes. I hate wearing coats, as a general principle, but this one is very lightweight and the strap is very soft across my tummy, and I don't mind it so much.

Rupert: I also have one, but for when the weather is a little milder, or until I put on some more weight - for the time being, I'm sticking to my nice warm Landa.

Sasha: You also have new jammies, don't you?

Rupert: I don't think we need to go into the jammies. The whole subject is rather personal.

Sasha: But surely you want to show everypup how you stopped wearing the purple jammies...

Sasha: ... because they are mine!

Rupert: Oh, why did you have to go and do that?

Sasha: Please forgive me for being seen in non-safety coat clothing, but we'd been out in the rain, so we were a bit soggy underneath, and our human wanted to take us in the car which was very cold, so she made us wear our jumpers.

Rupert: They are very comfortable for in the car - we can just curl up. That's why I use my new red jumper as jammies.

Sasha: How about that time you wore my bathrobe? When I was a little puppy our Auntie Robin gave me a pink bathrobe, and now you use it every time you have a bath.

Rupert: I do not!

Sasha: Er... I beg to differ...

Rupert: Hey, come on, that's not fair! I was all wet and cold, and very vulnerable! And it has this nice hood to keep my head warm until I dry off. I was forced to wear it! Resistance was futile!

Sasha: I don't remember you resisting...

Rupert: Well it's not like our human makes us wear clothes for the sake of it - it's all there for a reason. No gratuitous clothes-wearing in this household!

Sasha: That's true. There's just gratuitous clothes-wearing at our cousins Bertie and Oliver's house. You did a bit of it there, didn't you?

Rupert: Oh, come on, I wasn't really wearing that costume, I was just experimenting, everyone was doing it, I didn't inhale!

Sasha: Huh? You didn't inhale? Why wouldn't you breathe?

Rupert: Um... isn't that what you're supposed to say? Oh, just forget it. Hey, did you see the email our human sent to Fluppies enquiring about getting a custom-made purple coat for you?

Sasha: No! She didn't! She wouldn't do that to me!

Rupert: It said something about having purple hearts on the reverse side.

Sasha: No, no! Hmmm... purple hearts, you say...?